Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Whoever said that happiness is a state of mind was an alcoholic

They can put a man on the moon, send a mission to mars, shoot a camel in the middle of the Kalahari desert from the sky, divide a fucking molecule into sub-particles, but they cannot come up with a cure for the common cold? Priorities, people. Where are our priorities?



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You're bravely weathering the flu. You fell as irritated and helpless as the guy trying to teach John McCain about the internet. You decide to watch TV to distract yourself from everything. Then you switch it on, expecting to be entertained out of your miseries, when suddenly you see the following message on your tv:



"The STB cannot receive a signal".



You try to stay calm. You restart and try again. Maybe the bad message will go away. It does not. You then remember that it's satellite television. It does not work during rain, tornadoes, eclipses, sunshine, moonlight, boogie nights etc. Basically the equipment is a piece of crap. Then you get more cranky, call up the customer service and ask them to shove the stb up their useless asses. They pretty much don't have an answer to that, so you bang the phone down. Yes, you showed them.

Then you realize, that you still can't see the flippin TV. Aargh.



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Thinking positively only works when you're high. Or when you're scaling Mount Everest.




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I have more medicines flowing in my blood stream right now than Courtney Love has in her medicine cabinet. In fact, I think all the bacteria in my veins must be really, really high right now.



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Does anybody else find it strange that even though I'm heavily drugged, I can still recall who Courtney love is?



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This has been one boring, big-ass post. However, please do not blame me. Please blame western medicine. Thanks.

13 comments:

flygye12 said...

bebe's down with fever too :( and his asshole boss made him go to work today...first swati then me then bebe....next is who ?

closetalk said...

Courtney Love?
Courtney LOVE??
COURTNEY love???

o... my! :)

Kris Bass said...

Son,

(once again assuming the bearded, elderly Doctor's role in the blog-world)

Relax. It is not the end of the world. It's just a flu. And flus are spread by viruses. There are many different viruses which cause these flus and colds. And such ones, do 'mutate' to change themselves every now and then. That's the reason why we don't have effective medication for colds.

What you could do is to have soups and take rest. An occasional antipyretic/decongestant will help definitely. What are you taking now?

And I'm not the least surprised by Courtney Love's mention. You have to be high to remember some wonderful things. I think this is one of such moments.

D said...

The viruses are having a field day everywhere, field week and month too, if there's anything like that! Ask me. Better still, ask my eyes, my nose, my stomach, my skin!

Firebolt said...

I just recovered from fever and a bad bout of flu as well. Good luck, buddy.

And oh, I didn't thank you earlier for adding my blog to your roll.

So, thank you.

Cheers! ^_^

P.S. I almost forgot about Courtney Love. You remember her because you are high.

Neha said...

Awww you poor thing! I hate the flu...I get even more cranky than usual, and that's NOT good! Don't worry..you'll be bright and chirpy in no time! Till then, turn the idiot box off (the shows on TV justify that name), take a book and listen to some music, and u'll be all calm and composed soon :P!

Anyway, take care Rambo! Get well soon!

chandni said...

you basically need to see me more often...a little dose of chandu keeps the doctor away :P

Swats said...

wishing u a speedy recovery :-)

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

capt fly: these days everywhere i turn, almost everybody has the flu .... it just doesn't want to go away .....

ct: Yes, you heard correctly. Ms Love is a mascot for all of us who are dependent on foreign ....err... marijuana. :P ...

Dr Rockabilly aka Kriss Bass: Don't you know me by now? Everything is the end of the world for us. And to quote one of my favorite philosophers, Phoebe Boufay, "You doctors really don't know anything do ya?" ... :P ....What's an antipyretic? Is it a new rock group?

D: awww ... I know .. feels like the end of the world, doesn't it?

firebolt: thanks ... yeah .. i forgot that courtney love is the mascot of getting high. and thanks for adding my blog to your roll too .. :D ...

neha: thanks .. right now my crankiness is at "outrageously high". the neighbors have started selling their houses at throwaway prices... and that was even before the flu .. :( ...

chandni: yeah ... so you should visit me with 3 cute gay guys who can blow and a bowl of chicken soup :P ....

sawts: thank you ...

The Line of Beauty said...

some flu virus doing the round in blogosphere...though, excellent weather in Delhi these days, go out and have fun when you recover!

Kris Bass said...

You know what Rambws, these symptoms of cold usually recede by itself in a week. To alleviate the suffering during the period of illness, modern medicine has invented a lot of good stuff.

Pyerexia - fever. Anti-pyretics - drugs for treating fever (raised temperature). Crocin is the classic example. (Paracetamol)

Phoebe Boufay is my favorite philosopher from FRIENDS. But I rate these guys higher - Jerry Seinfeld, Karen Walker & Jack McFarland.

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

lob: yeah .. i know... everybody seems to be catching it ... the weather makes it worse :( ...

Dr Bass: I was just cranky earlier. With me, a flu and cold stay for a long time. I've had lots of paracetamol and anti-allergy.Oh, and Karen Walker is the best philospher e-v-e-r. :P..

unsungpsalm said...

Yep, all hail Ms. Walker!

Ramby, I'm glad for a flu that makes thee write in to us!

All hail Ramby's flu, as well :P