Tuesday, July 8, 2008
Now, we realize that we are in no position to pontificate and impart any sort of wisdom. In fact, we are legally obligated not to. However, we do feel the need to enumerate certain facts of life for people who are as clueless as we are:
- you raise eyebrows when you show up for an exam in a drunken state and then shrug your shoulders and say "C'mon .. it was fuckin New Year's Day ..." to the examiner; however things iron out themselves when you score the highest in that particular exam while you fail miserably in the ones which you attempted when you were sober
- it is not okay to tell your Dad's business associate, even if you mean to be subtle, that you don't think he possesses the maturity level required to understand The Godfather and are thus not going to lend it to him under any circumstance
- it is somewhat excessive to have an email debate spanning 54 messages sent back and forth with your company's Human Resources department about whether a certain type of trouser qualifies as formal wear or not
- it can somehow harm your career a little bit when you tell your boss's boss to go ahead and "get a life and for fuck sake and stop bloody bugging me just because you feel the need to justify your pay"
- in some circles it is considered inappropriate to make a lot of jokes that imply that a newly wedded couple might have committed incest by getting married; specially right before their wedding night in front of their extended family & friends
- some mothers do not consider tuna salad and black coffee as a replacement for green vegetables and milk no matter how many fake statistics you quote; it just goes to prove that you can fool anyone in the whole world but you just can't fool Mom
- it is not well received when you look at a new born baby and insist that he looks more like the couple's driver and less like the father; you surprisingly are not made to feel welcome in the couple's house afterwards
- your advice is not welcomed when you tell someone who just graduated from school that "life is going to suck anyway so it doesn't matter whateverthefuck you choose as a career"