Tuesday, July 8, 2008

Clueless Wisdom


Now, we realize that we are in no position to pontificate and impart any sort of wisdom. In fact, we are legally obligated not to. However, we do feel the need to enumerate certain facts of life for people who are as clueless as we are:


- you raise eyebrows when you show up for an exam in a drunken state and then shrug your shoulders and say "C'mon .. it was fuckin New Year's Day ..." to the examiner; however things iron out themselves when you score the highest in that particular exam while you fail miserably in the ones which you attempted when you were sober

- it is not okay to tell your Dad's business associate, even if you mean to be subtle, that you don't think he possesses the maturity level required to understand The Godfather and are thus not going to lend it to him under any circumstance

- it is somewhat excessive to have an email debate spanning 54 messages sent back and forth with your company's Human Resources department about whether a certain type of trouser qualifies as formal wear or not

- it can somehow harm your career a little bit when you tell your boss's boss to go ahead and "get a life and for fuck sake and stop bloody bugging me just because you feel the need to justify your pay"

- in some circles it is considered inappropriate to make a lot of jokes that imply that a newly wedded couple might have committed incest by getting married; specially right before their wedding night in front of their extended family & friends

- some mothers do not consider tuna salad and black coffee as a replacement for green vegetables and milk no matter how many fake statistics you quote; it just goes to prove that you can fool anyone in the whole world but you just can't fool Mom

- it is not well received when you look at a new born baby and insist that he looks more like the couple's driver and less like the father; you surprisingly are not made to feel welcome in the couple's house afterwards

- your advice is not welcomed when you tell someone who just graduated from school that "life is going to suck anyway so it doesn't matter whateverthefuck you choose as a career"

30 comments:

Neha said...

Hahaha...gosh u spell out the recipe for suicide :p! Right there...all those things might very well get you killed :P!

Anonymous said...

hmmm.... happy 25.
or, is it 30?
:)

Anonymous said...

Might I ask what this certain type of trouser is that you refer to?

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

neha: .. yes .. we've been almost killed a number of times .... but as the song goes "I'm a Survivor ... I barely made it ... "

ct: Noooooooooooooooooo ......
*breathes* *counts to 10* *takes medication for panic attack* ... we're over 25 but not yet 30 .... not for another 4 years ... *breathes again* .. *gets out bottle of vodka* .... thanks??

usp: Sure .. the said trousers were of the corddry variety ... there were debates, quotes, screenshots, testimonials from garment makers .... nothing extraordinary ...

pepe M. said...

gosh, the baby who looks like the driver???? you are nuts whippy!!!still im laughing like mad here! i hate you...:)

iz said...

I must have commited all these. No wonder I have no friends....

iz said...

I must have commited all these. No wonder I have no friends....

Anonymous said...

Isn't there some kind of rule which says that you never ask a gay guy his age?

Not out of courtesy but because he should show it anyway and you should be clued in enough to guess it?

Shame on you CT.

As for you Whippy - I like your last observation. It seems to be true.

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

pepe: awww ... love you 2 .. pepe ... :P ..hehe

iz: maybe that's why people keep ignoring me/running away/getting a restraining order from me?? Maybe I should think about it .... hmmmm ...

orange: to be fair, i look 80 and have the mental faculties of a 15 year old ... maybe that confused ct ... u never knw ...

Anonymous said...

Aha! Corduroy? They are such a relief from the regular fare! Don't let them throw you off your ground!
You go girl!

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

it happened a few months ago .... and they had to finally bow down to the WhipperSnapper and had to ammend their company policy ...

ah! good times ... *daydreams*

as i keep saying, I haven't met an argument I haven't won ..... :P

ironically, i don't wrk tere ne more ...

btw, thx for "Corduroy" .. the correct spelling had slipped my mind ... :P ...

Anonymous said...

hahahaha very funny. Baby who looks like driver, telling boss at his face, jokes on newly wed couple... hahaha. Are you trying to kill yourself? hahaha

Anonymous said...

*RambWS
No worries. I had to google it, myself! :P

Anonymous said...

OMG I LOVE THE NEW TEMPLATE! I'm SO Bloody JEALOUS!

I want to swtich to blogger... i really do... should I?

Gaah!

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

@unsung:

i know ... i was bored of the whole plane-joe thing going on with the previous one ...

yes, switch to blogger .... just blogport your posts and switch ... life is too short to write on the same template forever ...

Humming Bird in Hyde said...

I know I'm clueless. Now I'm more clueless, lol. Nice one.

The Line of Beauty said...

lol..I so agree with the last one..wishing to change my career and them rationalizing!

Anonymous said...

Went through the import procedure of blogger....

there isn't one!
I suppose i'll have to stick to this until I can buy my own online space :((

Anonymous said...

interesting new template, with the dark jungle and all...

but i MUST be growing old as u say... not too much a fan of black background websites. lol.

Unknown said...

hey dude - love ur blog - ur a great writer -i got a blog too - visit it sometime. www.apopulardudessecretlife.blogspot.com. talk soon.

Vibrance-Reincarnated said...

Hahaa....this cracked me up.

The formal trouser thingie was the winner !

You noted out the points qite cleverly, n the clarity of your observationism is commendable !!

Vibrance-Reincarnated said...

Oh btw, where on earth you dug out this blog name from ?!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

When did this happen? What year is it? Have I been gone too long?

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

humming: thanks ...

lob: that's my philosophy!!

unsung: awww ... that sucks ... there must be some way ... can't you rss you wp posts to blogger??

ct: thankx ... i usually don't like a black background either but i kinda fell in love with tis template .... and i NEVER said you're old ... lol

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

secret blogger: thankx buddy ... sure ...

vibrance: hehe .. thankx!! i don't remeber exactly but whippersnapper is from an archie story i read years ago ....

orange: yes orange ... it's the year 2058 and the gays have taken over ..:P ...

D said...

For a first time visitor like me, this is quite an introduction to the person who writes this blog!

pepe M. said...

whoa love the template!
but no new enty yet? :)

mwah!

Anonymous said...

OK Ram, you are trying to bring everyone to blogger? Hehehe anyway loved your new template.
Yeah it's bad that wordpress doesn't allow modifying template for free. Too bad!!

And you guys are making me feel abt moving to wordpress :(

Anonymous said...

I meant bad.

**feeling like remorse**

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

d: hehe .. welcome to the craziness of the whippersnapper .. :P ..

pepe: thanks dude ... :P .. will post shortly ..


dk: yeah ... i'm gay for google .. :P ... yeah you deserted us like obama's supporters deserted the clintons .. :P ... thou you can always move back ... :P ...