Monday, November 10, 2008

Does everything have to have a point?

So I got an email a few days ago from "that" site. It said that I haven't used it for about four months and they were wondering if I forgot my password. I know, I know. I am to blame for not trying and blah blah. That's not the point right now. It's that I wonder if I can ever get over myself long enough to actually try to find someone, and if by some divine miracle I do, I just wish I don't get turned off because he starts every second sentence with the word basically or thinks that being a vegetarian will slow down global warming.

Yes, I have issues. Lots of them. Duh.

Which, by the way, is another fear. That when I actually let someone in, he'll find out how neurotic and fucked up I am and run as fast a gay person used to run in biblical times when he was being chased by a congregation of catholics waiting to stone him.

In fact, my life right now is like a Merchant-Ivory film. Everybody is in their own self-imposed misery and the fat guy never gets laid.

****

I'm really going to print out a big sign which says "I don't work right now. Ask me why and I'll kill you and get an alibi". People need to stop thinking their Oprah. Some people just don't get it. I mean, if looking through a person while they are almost choking to death on a piece of sushi doesn't get the message through, I don't know what will.

****

Remember when I was in a funk and had nothing to say? The voices in my head have still not returned. I kind of miss a few of them. Specially Victor. He always made me feel that there is something on my shirt which is making me look funny which in turn is causing everybody to point and laugh at me.

Again, Issues. Clusterfucked brain. Crazy.


Run, baby, run.

30 comments:

D said...

Yeah, I hate Oprah clones too! And even Oprah talks on her show because she's paid to... what's with all the unsolicited advice that everyone has to offer?

Mamma mia! Me a mamma? said...

LOL @ the Merchant Ivory statement!

Sparkling said...

Now that's an interesting point! :)

Anonymous said...

Ever think you could have a stand up routine of your own? Or if standing up isn't your thing, maybe a regular funny column. You've got "it" in you. Don't let it go to waste.

Anonymous said...

Yes Yes, highly clusterfucked.

You should have it looked at. Look up a doctor on "that" site ;)

Anonymous said...

awww... the cheesy rant in the last post, and here whippy seems a bit down. :( u know, fuh-get about "that" site. plenty of times, when me and my pals wud just delete our profiles fro our "that" site... we'd crawl back and re-make profiles about 4 wks later, but then, perhaps its not too bad to get that... temporary distance. so... don't worry ure pretty li'l head about it - just go shoot some dumb ppl who voted for prop 8,m from your chopper... just like sexy sarah shoots wolves! :)

and say hello to "victor" for me...

Neha said...

No, everything doesn't have to have a point..as we prove time and again with our mindless rumble :P! Anyway..i'm baaaaaack :D! Still unemployed, still utterly nonsensical :D!

Anyway, you're single and gay! Fun awaits you my dear!! So chin up, and smile for me :)!

Keep Writing!

DewdropDream said...

Global warming is a direct result of insect flatulence. I have this on good authority.

That's all. For now.

Jiggy said...

Don't think have seen any merchant-ivory film...so no idea...
and why r ur inner voices not returning? and who is victor? i dint get that para only...:((((

Firebolt said...

@ RWS
Victor is off on a vacation to Sahara. Didn't he leave you a post-it note? I'm sure he stuck it on the fridge door so you couldn't miss it.

Oh My Dog, are you on a diet? NO... For the love of cute double-chins, NO!

@ Dew Drop Dream
Nice to meet you, Mrs Palin. I see you're not taking your defeat too well.

Cheers! ^_^

DewdropDream said...

I should've known my statement would be ridiculed by someone.

@ Firebolt: Wrong number there fella, try again :P

Prash said...

No inner voices ? so you mean you are cured ! hurray ! ;-) LOL

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

@d: free advice wheeling Oprah clones forget that we really don't care for their opinion ...

@mama mia1: thanks ...

@still thinking: which one??

@rakesh: thanks ... Wow .... I think I need to hire you as my motivation coach ...

@usp: So, were you attempting to be funny? If yes, then it sounded exactly like when Sarah Palin attempts to be intelligent!! :P ...

@ct: well, I only did msg one guy through that site and when he didn't reply back i didn't try after that ... so i think there has been a lot of space between me and that site .. :P ... not shoot em but with Satan's help i've arrange for them to be born as Sarah Palin's future children/grandchildren/great-grand children ...

and i will give your msg to victor when i can start hearing him again ...


@neha: that has to be chins up... :P ... yay onyou being unemployed too ... :P ... we're two of a kind, ya know ... :P ...

@ddd: ahem .. cough cough ... ..er ... huh .. ahem ... cough cough cough ..... ahem ..

@rebel: even i haven't seen many .. just know they suck ... "victor" is one of my inner voices ... don't worry ... it is hard sometimes ... :P ...

@firebolt: DIET?? WHO ME?? No, i'd rather have a mooseburger with a certain russia-watcher ... and I love that you have an answer for everything ... you're gonna go places, lady ....

@ddd: ahem .. cough cough ... ..er ... huh .. ahem ... cough cough cough ..... ahem ... you know we just yankin ya chain ... now cheer up and hand me that mooseburger .. :P ...

@prash: Cured? Who?? Me???? Lol .. that is an impossibility, sir ... that can almost never happen ... :P ...

Anonymous said...

Always willing to be hired. Lets negotiate. ;)

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

Well, before you start let me tell you that the hours are odd and the pay is in the form of vodka bottles ... :P ....

Anonymous said...

And what did you want me to do with the vodka bottles? ;)

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

Oh, the vodka is for me.

Do you accept monopoly money? Because that's all I have right now ... :P :P ...

lemon said...

hello!!
jus some b&s bitching! aren't u pissed that they completely ignored the ryan lafferty situation?! although they completely made up for it with kevin and scotty! god! why does scotty have to be so damn gorgeous!

Anonymous said...

*Rakesh
More William Shakespeare, less Chetan Bhagat!

Jiggy said...

@lemonade -> They ignored the ryan lafferty situation? the new episode has come out kya? damn....!!!
and i agree..why does scotty have to be so damn gorgeous?!! :((((

Sparkling said...

The one that states 'Does everything have to have a point?' :)

Red said...

hey...please go to mindred.blogspot.com...there's a post there for lemonade

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

@lemonade: I know!! No repercussions for Holly from Nora for what she said to Ryan's Dad.. Not even a simple and long "I know what you did, you husband-stealer" ...... Although I did like the whole Kevin-Scotty storyline, but why is scotty always whining? He's becoming a walker each passing day ... :P ... And someone should give robert something to do .... He needs to run for governor or something ... and at least win that ....

@usp: Huh? Did I miss something?? Although I agree whenever someone says less Chetan Bhagat ....

@rebel: Yes .. New episodes are broadcast on sunday and are available for d/l by monday evening

@still thinking: Oops!! My bad ... See. I'm not the sharpest of knives in te drawer, I'm just the fattest!! .. :P

Vee said...

Oh r u funny? Yes, Indeed..:)

Merchant-Ivory.. I am fan of their sucker movies.. wonder r u the fat guy....Lolz...

Nice read... and added u in the roll already..

Anonymous said...

*Ramby
Yes, you missed a lot of things. And you keep missing things.

Wasn't it you who said "Ignorance is divine"?

Ramby, you're playing with my admiration for you!

pepe M. said...

awww whippy baby...
and who is "victor"???gosh, what have i missed!!!!

hugs baby!!! missing you lots these days...

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

@oxy: Yup .. I'm the token fat guy ... :P ..

@usp: Nope .. I didn't say that .. it was some dude in the eighteen hundreds !!! Admiration???????? Confuse me??

@pepe: You're back!! "Victor" is the name of one of the voices in my head .... i can't hear him anymore .... not a real person .. only in my head ... :( ...

Anonymous said...

Oh, sigh!
Nevermind.
But it seems I can never look up to you again



:(

Rambunctious WhipperSnapper said...

Don't worry .. You will always look up to me .... I'm much taller





And you love to spend time on your knees ....

Anonymous said...

No, I'm not religious at all.

You're taller? How come? Got fat on the sole of your feet as well?